Friday, August 3, 2012

DON'T GIVE ME THAT %$#&


Some people collect rare books or knit or make model airplanes. My hobby is registering complaints!

Every day we all come up against dismissive service, poor customer relations and illogical corporate polices. To combat this, I have started my own quiet, small, hardly noticeable protests and have received some surprising results.

Some years ago, I dropped into Saks in Beverly Hills. The woman behind the cosmetics counter barely paid attention to me, the only customer on the floor. I waited, shooting her my best death stare. My powers must have been on the blink because she continued to ignore me. When she finally approached, she said they didn’t have what I asked for and walked away. I stormed out of the store so burned that if anyone had come within a foot of me they would have been incinerated. I tried to let it go but I just couldn’t get past it. So I wrote to Customer Relations and sent it off while I was still in a state of outrage. A few days later, a huge (HUGE!) basket arrived brimming with goodies and a lovely apology letter. Needless to say, I am still a Saks customer.

A while back, Congress was hard at work on the new health care bill. I read the bill and had some important suggestions…and complaints. Of course I thought nobody would listen to me. But it gnawed at me and after years of hearing “write your Congressman,” I did exactly that. I also sent email to my Senators and the President. A few form email responses later, I got discouraged and forgot it. Then one day the phone rang. It was someone from my Congressman’s office! He spent almost an hour discussing my concerns and answering my questions. There was one thing he didn’t know and said he would call me back. Ten minutes later, he did! Not only did he continue the conversation for a while, he gave me his direct dial number and encouraged me to call him in Washington anytime. It’s nice to have friends in high places. This fall, the Congressman is getting my vote!

Most recently, I purchased a gift card at CVS for my friend’s daughter. I was told it was their ‘policy that these have to be paid for in cash.’ OK, no problem. I forked over the money and the woman showed me the receipt that assured me the card had been activated. Unpacking at home, I noticed the receipt was not in the bag but I figured it’s CVS, I saw it was activated, no problem. Guess what? There was a problem. When my friend’s daughter went to use it she was told it was not activated. Her mother called the credit card company and they had no record of it. Livid, I went back to CVS and spoke with a staff supervisor. Over and over he said, “I can’t help you without a receipt.” Granted, he may have had a valid point but I am not one to let valid points stand in my way. Oh no, not me. I broke it down for him. I hounded him with logic. I used intellect, charm and small words. Hard to believe, it didn’t work. 

I guess he wanted to pass the buck because he told me I had to speak to the store manager, Derek, who wasn’t there but I swore I would go back. I did. Four times! I was beginning to think “Derek” was code for “crazy lady in store.” So I did what anyone of sound mind and a strong fight spirit would do – I gave up. I started scoping out other pharmacies in the neighborhood where I could take my business. But before I moved my account, I went online and wrote to Corporate. Later that day, my friend made me go back on the Derek hunt once more. This time, I brought her with me. I figured showing up with a posse would give me fighting chance. What do you know – Derek was there. He was charming, understanding, kind and instantly made good on the gift card. But wait, there’s more. A few days later, early morning, the phone rang. It was Jennifer at Corporate who said, “How can we make this right for you?” What? Did I hear that right? I told her Derek had taken care of it and she even laughed at my “code word” joke. She said she would pass this up the corporate ladder - Derek would get a commendation and the staff would get a scolding. How do I know they actually did that? Now when I go into CVS, the staff kisses the hem of my garment.

Over the years I have learned contradictory lessons: don’t make waves vs. the squeaky wheel, etc. I have chosen to squeak, squawk and shriek about bad service, nonsense policies and poor quality products. It doesn’t always get me satisfaction but at least I have said my piece.

I encourage you to join the revolution. If enough people do it perhaps it will become the newest fad sweeping the nation. What have you got to lose? And hey, if you don’t like it, you can always go back to stamp collecting.